Nature, Love, and Safety

When I was a child, I had the fortune to go to sleep-away girl scout camp on a scholarship, and that’s where I felt love and safety for the first time in my little life. It was in the middle of a coastal forest on the West Coast, and we slept in tents or open-structured buildings with all of Mother Earth’s creatures for company. There were always trees around us, holding us in their calming presence. So many strong, loving women, taught us to sing together in one voice. The song I remember best is always in my head when I walk in the forest, and I heard it there today:

“Green trees around us,
blue skies, above.
Friends all around us,
in a world filled with love.”

Mr. Rogers said — and I believe — that love is a verb, an active word, like struggle. I see much struggle, but also much love, in our world right now, and I am glad for it. I would rather have and build that kind of love.

I found a safe, quiet, peaceful place to nurture my soul today. I hope you found space for that, too. xx

p.s. The mountain had a message at the top for us! Scroll to the last photo, and take heart.

A Terrible Accident :(

Zia was in an accident four days ago, and that’s how we met Ella, an animal whisperer from a family of angels.

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Today Zia was sedated for a final X-ray, which confirmed there’s been no damage to her organs or bones. I’ve always thought she was resilient... but I’m totally dumbfounded that she is this ok after being run over by both wheels of a fast-moving mountain bike.

I am SO grateful for Ella’s kind parents and brother swooping in to care for us in our moment of need. After Zia was run over, I was more scared than I’ve ever felt in even our worst moments at sea. She made horrifying cries and her whole body crumpled up. Ella’s family showed up, drove us 30 minutes to the nearest emergency vet, comforted both of us, and let us spend an evening in their home while we monitored Zia post-accident. She began to perk up once the pain meds kicked in, and she’s been rapidly improving ever since. (Truthfully, she’s recovering faster than me...)

We’ve been taking it easy the last few days because Zia’s bruised and sore... which means that *just* as our boat projects finished and we could haul anchor, we’ve yet again had to postpone our departure for the South Island. The ocean has been calling loudly to me for weeks, and I’ve been yearning for freedom... but must just believe that all is as it’s meant to be.

And despite the awful circumstances, I’m glad for both of us that we got to meet Ella and her lovely family. They’ve reminded me that we can all bring more goodness into the world by just choosing to care for one another.

"Make me an instrument of peace . . . "

not every day is easy, but every day that I look into these eyes, I feel lucky. Zia loves in a way that is different from any love I’ve ever felt. She forgives quickly. She’s patient. She’s always ready to be happy together again. And when I have a hard day, like today, she comes to me to check in, and offers to wipe my tears away... (errr... but, with her tongue, so there’s definitely some room for improvement in her tissue technique).

Lately, life has been amazing and overwhelming, blessed and challenging. I’m lucky to encounter so much kindness in my life, but when I encounter unkindness (however infrequently), it still makes my stomach sink and my heart drop. I struggle to share about it when it’s happening, but I’m trying to find positive ways to talk about some of the challenges I face out here as a solo young woman.

I’ve always been sensitive, and perhaps all of the time with nature has made me struggle more with mankind. I know we are all imperfect, but I think we must set an intention to not lash out meanly at each other. I want us to love each other the way Zia loves me: with a kind and generous heart.

There was no faith or organized religion in my childhood, so I am discovering prayer late in life. I heard this one recently — perhaps known to many people — and it resonated deeply with me. Lately, no matter what happens each day, this is the prayer my soul is speaking:

“Make me an instrument of peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is discord, union; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.

Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, and it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.”

Thank you, Zia, for being this prayer embodied. I love you.